The New Year...

A time for new beginnings,

new possibilities, new challenges, adventures, complications.

Who knows what the New Year will hold?

Not I.

I’m not making any resolutions…I am big on planning but I don’t like making promises I know I won’t likely keep…to myself or others.  So, I will go quietly on my journey, one day at a time since we really don’t know what the future will hold, I will only attempt to do my best at whatever moment I find myself in and I know I’ll fall short of the mark a thousand times over…but I’ll keep trying again and again.  

So, for today…a time to celebrate how far I’ve come, the wonderful world around me, the family we’ve created and the blessings we’ve been given.

For tomorrow…Who knows?

St. Theresa’s Prayer

“May today there be peace within.

May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.

May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.

May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.

May you be content knowing that you are a child of God.

Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.

It is there for each and every one of us.”

Happy New Year!  Jen

I Found my Word for 2011!

Hi All!   Well, 4 days into the New Year, I really can't say I've accomplished a whole lot, but I'm not stressing yet and actually feeling pretty phenomenal right now as I've finally figured out what my "word" for 2011 will be. 
For those of you that are wondering what word?, why does she need a word?...is she crazy?, well...although I'm horrible at linking (so far!) I've been reading on other's blogs how they pick a word for the year and try to live it...I like the idea and realize that in my own backward sort of way I've been doing that a bit anyway, so I've thought and agonized, tried some on for size and threw them out with the bathwater but think I've now finally found one I'll stick with for 2011! 

.................Yay!  I'm sure you're incredibly excited for me, right??.................

Anyway before I introduce you to my 2011 word, I'll give you a background on what I sort of tried to live up to in 2010 to pretty good results..."I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."  Philippians 4:13.  I carried it through to alot of activities in my daily life whether in a religious sense, the strength to climb on my elliptical each day, do an art exhibit, do my daily work or tolerate all those intolerable things, etc... etc...   it really worked and I feel genuinely stronger now, but realize that strength is not all I need to journey on my path through this life and sometimes, just sometimes I don't like always being the strong one, so with that trait not mastered but substantially improved, I will now work on my next trait.   Drumroll please....

..............F  A  I  T  H ..................

  There it is, now I intend to live it.  Faith. Yes, first and foremost Faith in God, but faith in so many other things too.  I may be a "churchy" person, but faith is something that has never come easy to me and I'm going to work at changing that.
     I will have faith in my husband -that he really, truly, genuinely loves me and supports me and I don't need to doubt this (yes, I am a little demented that after 15 years married and a long courtship, you'd think I know, but....what can I say, just one of my crazy quirks!) 
               I will have faith in my children- that even though they're far from perfect, they're growing up just fine and learning to be the individuals they need to be (and just because they don't always live up to my exact game plan this does not mean that they're the devil's spawn!)
                         I will have faith in family and friends.  I intend to convince myself that everyone is not judging me.  I read some pretty convincing quotes to that effect in the wee hours this morning like: "Never confuse thoughtlessness with malice" by Robert Charles Whitehead  Besides, I really need to get over myself...do I really think everyone has nothing better to do than examine me?
                                            And finally,  I will have faith in ME.  I will not be neurotic, obsessive, very hard to live with, controlling, manipulative and on and on simply because I don't think I can "be" anyone better. I will have faith that I can succeed in whatever I undertake, I can push my creative limits, I can continue to learn about so many things and in so many ways and I can become who I've always wanted to be.  I  will let go and give in to faith and know that whatever I strive to accomplish, even if I fall flat on my face, that it's okay, I'm still okay.

So all in all a rather pompous post all about me and nothing else!...but then again if I can't talk about me on my blog, then where?

As for my art?...well I did this picture of a tree sometime ago and talked about feeling like I was fighting the wind, maybe I don't always have to...I love this quote by Toni Morrison: "If you surrender to the wind, you can ride it."  Not sure what I'll paint now, but I don't think it will be a tree rooted firmly to the ground!

Be kind to your shadow.  ~Rebecca Lawless   ...and have a great day!  Jen

The New Year & The Year We've just been Through!

Well, it's a sort of dismal and grey New Year's Day here at home and in ways this is reflected in my mood.  I've heard and read many stories of how 2010 was a challenging, sorrowful and hard year for a lot of people and I know it's true because I've been witness to some of these trials.
The year for me and mine has actually been pretty sweet though....and I suspect my "dis-ease" has a bit to do with that.  Can I really be fortunate enough to experience another good year or is this coming one my turn at the bad stuff?  Scary thoughts like these plague me from time to time and I suspect it's due to just a bit too much downtime in recent days, so my solution is to get busy, but before that, some wonderful (and some just plain average) blessings that happened in 2010 are as follows!

-my 4 kids continued to grow and flourish, they drove me crazy alot, made me laugh even more and created dirty laundry like nobody's business but stayed healthy and strong and usually intelligent...what more could a momma want?
-my hubbie...he stayed!  Weaker men would have just thrown up their arms in desperation and left my sorry ass many moons ago, so the fact that he's as crazy as me has really worked in my favour!
-he also finally grasped the courage to sing...first, to me  (he's been singing to his cows for years) and then, as the year progressed, even to others...this is BIG 'cause he's finally doing something just for him!   
-my home, although not still (or likely ever) entirely finished is pretty cool and well, very much my HOME!
-my parents, relatives, friends all made it through 2010 and seem as though they are up to the challenge of living large in 2011.
-after over a decade of diapers, I finally closed that chapter of my life and did not regret it's passing!
-we planted 500 live and 1100 cuttings of cold tolerant grapevines on land we've been eyeing for years...now to see if our fledgling vineyard will flourish or fail, a new and exciting venture!
-I participated in my very first art exhibition ever...in my mind it was a success, I sold quite a few canvases and got my foot in the door of the art community.
-I am blessed to be part of a wonderful church where we meet as extended family, laugh, cry, discuss and support each other in what we do and have forged relationships that will last through and beyond all the daily junk that gets thrown in our way if we just remember to hang on!
-I've laughed, cried and lived and hope to continue with more of the same....all GOOD STUFF!

So, nothing really all that spectacular, but in putting my thoughts to print my grey mood has just about vanished and rather than look forward with hesitation and trepidation, I'm excited to see where 2011 will go!
Some challenges and maybe sort of resolutions  for 2011 are:
-to get in better shape, not the running up and down the sliding hill a gazillion times without losing my breath kind of shape that my incredible sister got herself into over the past year, but taking the time regularily for physcial activity to strengthen body and clear my mind.
-to create enough art to successfully participate in the "Pontiac Studio Artist's Tour" which I have signed up for to take place the middle 2 weekends of June.
-to later hold an exhibition at the local Cafe of the same art...or more...depending on just how well June goes!
-to think about me and mine before I take on or agree to numerous projects...this sounds a little selfish, but as our lives have spiralled into high speed in the past few years because of decisions  made, I realize I need to strengthen the "foundation" of the family before I go out there throwing it around in high winds on a daily basis!
-to organize my time, the home, the business, the financial situation, the mind...so that if or when that wind starts whipping around we will STAND.
-to take a couple of days to just BE with just hubbie and me, no shopping list, dairy seminar, dental appointment, or renovation project tagging along, but just us...something that we have simply not done for more than a couple hours since our honeymoon over 15 years past, I cannot wait!

 I really didn't write a whole lot of exciting up there, just average, so if you've managed to stay awake...congrats! BUT!... I think average is so much better than so many people throughout this great big world ever get the chance to have that I must be truly blessed!  May you be able to live your lives fully in 2011 and also be blessed in more ways than You can imagine...thanks for tuning in and hopefully the New Year will rock!