All my work (that would fit) is now hung in the Cafe and on display for all to critique and hopefully...enjoy.
I'm not sure why I'm exhausted, but I am. The process of creating art is much more pleasing than measuring and spacing and placing disparate groups of mismatched frames while Cafe goers come and go amidst my personal chaos.
I want everything to look perfect, I want to please people, I want to be successful.
But what does that mean to me, exactly? Not sure.
Sure, I'd love to turn all that art into cash and pay off a bit of debt, sure, I'd love to be well known as a great artist.
But somewhere deep down I think I'm looking for approval. Always looking for approval everywhere and I find the hunt extremely exhausting. So to clarify, it's not that pat on the head, "you did good" type of approval I want, but approval where I can look in the mirror, look into my own eyes and know that I did the best I could and know that God knows too and not care one flying fig leaf what anyone else really thinks. That's the type I'm looking for and it's getting a bit easier to find that.
Because- I'm getting more comfortable in my own skin as I get older.
Because- I'm realizing that I'm really not as important as I once thought I was and I'm good with that.
Because- I think I did the best I could for right now.
So, if I were to title my exhibit, which I'm not, I would likely
not call it "Seasons" (which would make sense) or even my lofty idea of "God Speaks" (an interpretation better explained on a more coherent day) but likely just "The best of me for now" , not too catchy or earth shattering but simple and true.
If my art can make someone smile, remember, dream or just lose themselves for even a moment then I can be content knowing that I've done exactly all I need to do.
I think I'll sleep well tonight.
....and I will update the gallery very soon.